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She’s Merkel-licious! The Most Powerful Woman on the Plaid Planet!

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So delicious (It's hot hot)
So delicious (she put them boys on rock rock)
So delicious (They want a slice of what she got)
She's Merkel-licious (t-t-t-t-t tastey, tastey)

Merkel-licious def-, Merkel-licious def-, Merkel-licious def-
Merkel-licious definition make them boys go crazy
Them world leaders love her–they want to make her babies
That Chancellor of Hotness, and of Germany's
She's the M to the E, R, K the L the E
And can't no other lady put it down like she…
She's Merkel-licious

Hello again world watchers! The Plaid Avenger has bopped back to Berlin to meet up with his favorite female fraulein freedom fighter…and seemingly the baddest ass lady leader in the world: Angela Merkel, the Chancellor of Germany! Damn, I love a woman in power! And this lovely lady has got it going on: she's not only the current leader of Germany, but has also just led the most recent meeting of the G-8, and is also the current leader of the EU, and is also the undisputed leader of the worldwide movement to lower carbon emissions in order to slow global warming. And, and, and…this woman is all over the place! She is smokin' on fire, busy as a bee, kickin' ass and takin' names global-style. Dig this:

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And even though she's a lady, Angela has got more balls than virtually any other world leader on the planet. Okay, I forgot about that the total Russian bad-ass Vladimir Putin…he's got balls-a-plenty too—dudes! I'd like to see a cage match between those two world leaders! Wow, that would be insane! Or better yet, a drinking competition. A German versus a Russian in a drink-off! Holy shit, that might last for a week! But I digress as usual….let's get back to the story….

Chancellor Angela Merkel is a world leader that I think you just absolutely have to get to know. She is one of those leader-types that is actually changing the entire world in which we live. And she has tremendous clout on the world stage right now, which makes her even more powerful than merely a leader of a single country. What the hell am I rambling about now? Well, I'll tell you…

Politically, Angela Merkel is what you Americans would call on the conservative side of the spectrum. Her German political party, the Christian Democratic Union, would be comparative to the Republican Party in the US. As such, US President George Bush loves her sweet German ass! Check out the photo spread below: it was taken at a 2006 G-8 summit when George tried to give Angela a shoulder massage during the meeting. Ha! She was mortified! How fucking hilarious is that shit! He is such a goober!

Seriously though, Bush loves her! Angela's predecessor was Chancellor Gerhard Schröder, and he was much more on the liberal side of the spectrum, much more like the Democrats in the US. As such, Bush and Gerhard didn't get along so well. In fact, they hated each other. Under Schröder, Germany (along with France) were vehemently opposed to the US invasion of Iraq, and relations between the two countries sucked ass. But since Angela's arrival in November 2005, US/German relations have been downright peachy! Well, except for that fucked up shoulder massage deal….

So the once soured relations between these two titans has significantly softened—remember, US has the #1 economy on the planet, Germany is #3. Political and economic relations have both improved radically in the last year, with the US avidly supporting economic incentives within Germany, and vice-versa. On top of that, the German economy under Merkel has been doing exceptionally well too. According to a recent poll, Merkel is the most popular Chancellor in post-war German history—I guess Hitler would still hold the top marks if you included the whole 20^th century—oops!

But hold the phone! We're not done yet, because Angela has been doing a whole lot more than just leading her country! She is also the current head of the European Council, which is kind of like a CEO board for the European Union. The Council, like the EU, has a rotating leadership cycle, and Germany's ticket was called for this year. So Ms. Merkel has also been extremely busy trying to strengthen the European Union—mostly by getting the EU constitution revamped and ready for member countries to vote on, and hopefully pass this time! The constitution got voted down last year, and the EU has been kind of floundering around every since. We'll do a blog on the EU soon, but just know this for now: Germany under Merkel is a huge fan of beefing up the Union and making it stronger and more centralized (kind of like a United States of Europe), while several other countries (most notably the UK) do not want a beefier EU. We shall see how that plays out later this year….

So are we done yet? Not hardly! Merkel's Germany also just hosted the latest G-8 summit; a summit which consisted of the richest, industrialized, democratic nations on the planet. And she let those guys have it too! Merkel is a staunch advocate of decreasing CO2 emissions in an effort to combat climate change, and as such was one of the creators of the Kyoto Protocol back in 1997 which called for all countries to set targets to decrease carbon crap output…you know: pollution. Many countries have been on-board for the idea, but what country do you think has outright refused to participate from the start? Yep…that's right …the good ol' US of A! And that's why I want you to know how important Angela is, because it looks as if her global push for this stuff is actually starting to win over the US too! (US turning around on global warming). It's amazing! She is the global shizznit!

To finish the rant: Merkel-licious has also been touring the globe, promoting trade relations with Germany of course, but also pushing her climate agenda, human rights stuff, European Union prerogatives, and even pressuring countries to step up against bullshit situations like the ones in Sudan, Iraq, and Afghanistan. She has partied across Europe, the Middle East and is currently on an Asian tour. Damn! When does this chick sleep?

So know your Merkel. Know she is a very popular conservative leader of Germany. Know that she has improved relations with the US greatly. Know that she is the global leader in the fight for reduced CO2 shit. Know that perhaps it is her political savvy combined with her more pro-US stance that has influenced the Americans to change their minds about the CO2 reduction shit. Hmmmmm…..now you are smarter than your average bear! And I want to see Merkel in a plaid miniskirt…..wow! Too hot too handle!

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