The World's Plaidiest News Source

Mohamed ElBaradei: Call him ‘Cool Hand Nuke’

Whew! Finally thawing out from my weekend Arctic adventures, and what better The Cool One himself: Mohamed El is in the house!place to do it than a coffee house here in Vienna, Austria. Hell, these people invented the coffee house! Mmmmm….soaking up the warmth of a good cup of joe spiked with Zirbenz…my favorite Alpine liqueur. Ahhh…inhaling the heady smoke of a dark bean roast whilst having my shoulders massaged by a sweet little fraulein…oops, where was I? Oh yes! Vienna! What brings the Avenger here, you ask? Well, I had to come down to chill at IAEA headquarters and party with my favorite Austrian Egyptian, Mohamed ElBaradei, who once again finds himself in hot water. Ha! How fitting! Hot water in a coffee house…oh my, sometimes I am too damn good! To the facts:

France ups ante in war of words with Iran over nuke issue

France seeks new set of sanctions on Iran

Europeans Tone Down War Rhetoric in Iran Nuclear Stand-Off

Western talk of Iran war premature "hype": IAEA head

ElBaradei at center of standoff over Iran's nuclear program

The man at work in Vienna…So before we get to this Elbaradei cat and why he's so damn important, let's browse over the headlines. In a nutshell, Iran has been developing its nuclear program at a rapid pace. Iran has claimed from the get go that their program is all about nuclear energy production, and no more. In their defense, Iran is a signatory of the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty (NPT): a treaty which prohibits the spread of nuke weapons, encourages disarmament of states with nuke weapons, and allows for the development of nuke energy. So far, Iran has been a lawful abider of this treaty, having broken none of its rules. Sorry! I know a lot of folks don't want to hear that. I'm not defending them…it's just the way it is.

However, the US and 'the West' don't like and don't trust Iran, so they believe the Iranians are really after development of nuclear weapons. In their defense, they could be right. That Iranian regime is far from anything you would call stable and sensible. But given the US/the West's involvement in all the countries surrounding Iran (Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan), I can see why they might crave the security blanket that a nuke bomb might provide them. This is just plaid conjecture of course, but I can understand why they might want one. Can't you? Hell, if I lived anywhere near the Middle East, I'd want as much ammunition as I could get. Shit, I'd park a scud missile in my garage….but I digress as usual…

So Iran wants a nuke program, 'the West' does not want that to happen, and the issue has been heating up here lately…as if the Middle East needed more heat? The US and the EU have been Sarkozy: bringing the heat by calling for strict sanctions against the country in order to force them to give up the nuke stuff. And this week's heat has been coming from quite the unexpected source: the French! Ever since Nick Sarkozy took over as President of France (see: Sarkozy the Shit-Kicker), those guys have seemingly grown some escargot balls of steel overnight. The Frenchies have been insistent that all steps will be taken to ensure that Iran will never have a nuke program…including the possibility of war!

What a bizarre turn of events for the French: they are never the instigators of war….they usually just surrender when the war breaks out. Damn! You know you must be pissing people off if the French want to fight you! Shit! Hitler couldn't even pull that one off! I just can't help but think that the US is finding all this terribly amusing: the Frenchies are being more bad-ass than the Bush-ies! How sweet would that be though: the US sending in 'the boys in berets' as its first assault wave? Ha! Yep, this situation continues to get hotter and hotter as the weeks pass….but there is a splash of cold water to all of this rhetoric…and that cool water's name is Mohamed ElBaradei. I refer to him as 'Cool Hand Nuke', and he is the real point of today's blog.

You've got to know this dude, because his opinion, and his voice, will be seriously affecting how shit gets played out on our planet in the coming years. Big time. So who is he? Mohamed IAEA logoElBaradei is an Egyptian diplomat and Director General of the IAEA….aka the International Atomic Energy Agency, a sub-organization of the UN. And an important one at that. The IAEA's basic mission is to promote the peaceful use of nuke technology for energy purposes while simultaneously limiting nuke technology for weapons purposes. They are often referred to as "the UN's Nuclear Watchdog". These are the guys who do inspections on facilities the world over to ensure that the IAEA and the NPT's aims are being met.

As the head of the IAEA, ElBaradei has the daunting task of compiling all the investigative clues and deciding if a country is breaching the NPT by trying to create nuke weapons. And this is a shitty job. Why? Look at the headlines again from above. Because there is so much political drama between countries, ElBaradei and his crew are constantly harassed from all sides when they make any decision or recommendation. No matter what the IAEA decides, its sure to piss someone off.

Colin sez:

Want an example? Sure, here's one you'll remember: In the lead up to the current US/Iraq War, the US hounded the shit out of the IAEA to declare that Iraq had weapons. The IAEA went into Iraq to inspect, which pissed off the Iraqis. The IAEA couldn't find enough evidence to support the claim of a nuke program, and ElBaradei made those facts public, which pissed the shit out of the US. As the story has unfolded after the US invasion, it turns out that ElBaradei was right, which pissed the US even more. In fact, the US was so pissed that it tried to block ElBaradei from being appointed to his third term in office. It was hilarious! The US tried to get their buddy Australia to put up a candidate to defeat Mohamed, but he is just to popular and even the Aussies wouldn't do it! Ha! It's just like high school man!

Laugh it up! Tomorrow there may be a war!Long story short: know your ElBaradei. He is a level-headed dude who has been striving for peaceful resolution to world nuke issues for over a decade. He is routinely berated by the US and 'the West' who think he is too soft on Middle Eastern countries that they want to invade. He looks for facts, not speculation. He is a quiet, reserved man who doesn't go to award dinners, doesn't jet-set, doesn't hang out with world leaders, and doesn't play politics. He is a calm in the storm that is international politics: the mere fact that he pissed off nearly everyone is a good indicator that he is doing something right! As referenced in the story above, he put the smack-down on France for their hot-headed words concerning a strike against Iran by basically saying: France, chill out with 'the hype.' Quote: "I ask everyone to hold their horses until we do the process," Ha! Hold your horses Frenchies!

Don't mess with Mohamed my friends! This dude won the Nobel Peace Prize in 2005 (jointly with the IAEA), and he donated his winnings to set up orphanages in Egypt. He is the bomb! Oops…no pun intended. For all of this, and more, I call him Cool Hand Nuke. Hell, this dude may end up preventing a damn war or two, so be sure you know who he is, and what he is up to. His opinions Sweet! Plaid ski bunny on the slopes!can make or break a nuke program, a country, or a war effort. Seriously. If ElBaradei decides that Iran is breaching the rules, than one word from him can easily incite an invasion from the West.

As for me…its about time to hit the slopes. Where are my plaid ski pants?….

Comments Bookmark and Share

Keep in Touch with Plaid Updates

Get the University Textbook

The Plaid Avenger's World

Are you a college professor teaching World Regions or Global Political classes? Pick up the cutting edge, most entertainly educating textbook currently on the market.

Preview

Get the Comic Books

Issue 2: Battle For Burma

Well, the battle for the heart and soul of this country is on, but no one outside Burma seems to be able to do a damn thing about it! Why not?

Preview
click to profile Burma Thein Sein President
click to profile Italy Mario Monti Prime Minister
click to profile Spain Mariano Rajoy Prime Minister
click to profile North Korea Kim Jong-un Heir leader
click to profile Japan Yoshihiko Noda Prime Minister
click to profile South Sudan Salva Kiir President
click to profile Poland Bronisław Komorowski President
click to profile Peru Ollanta Humala President
click to profile United States Leon Panetta Secretary of Defense
click to profile Yemen Ali Abdullah Saleh President
click to profile Algeria Abdelaziz Bouteflika President
click to profile Belarus Alexander Lukashenko President
click to profile Australia Rupert Murdoch Chairman and CEO of News Corporation
click to profile United States Warren Buffett CEO of Berkshire Hathaway
click to profile China Liang Guanglie Minister for National Defense
click to profile China Zhou Xiaochuan Governor of the People's Bank
click to profile Pakistan Ashfaq Kayani Chief of Army Staff
click to profile General Electric Jeffrey Immelt CEO
click to profile China Li Changchun Propaganda Chief of China
click to profile Jordan King Abdullah II King of Jordon
click to profile Peru Alan Garcia President
click to profile United States Ben Bernanke 14th Chairman of the Federal Reserve
click to profile United States Hillary Clinton Secretary of State
click to profile China Xi Jinping Vice President
click to profile United States Robert Gates Secretary of Defense
click to profile World Bank Robert Zoellick President
click to profile Apple Steve Jobs Chairman and CEO, Apple Inc
click to profile Panama Ricardo Martinelli President
click to profile Brazil Dilma Rousseff President
click to profile Nigeria Goodluck Jonathan President
click to profile Colombia Juan Manuel Santos President
click to profile Chile Sebastián Piñera President
click to profile Japan Naoto Kan Prime Minister
click to profile Australia Julia Gillard Prime Minister
click to profile United Kingdom David Cameron Prime Minister
click to profile IAEA Yukiya Amano Director General
click to profile Bolivia Evo Morales President
click to profile United Kingdom Tony Blair Former Prime Minister
click to profile Egypt Mohamed ElBaradei Opposition figure
click to profile Japan Yukio Hatoyama Prime Minister
click to profile NATO Anders Fogh Rasmussen Secretary General
click to profile Germany Angela Merkel Chancellor
click to profile Vatican City Pope Benedict XVI Pope
click to profile UN Ban Ki-moon Secretary-General
click to profile Burma Aung San Suu Kyi Opposition leader
click to profile Tibet Dalai Lama His Holiness
click to profile Lebanon Sayyed Hassan Nasrallah Hezbollah leader
click to profile Syria Bashar al-Assad President
click to profile Palestine Mahmoud Abbas President
click to profile Gaza Khaled Mashal Hamas Leader
click to profile Israel Benjamin Netanyahu Prime Minister
click to profile Iraq Nouri Kamel al-Maliki Prime Minister
click to profile United Arab Emirates Mohammed Maktoum Prime Minister
click to profile Egypt Hosni Mubarak President
click to profile Libya Muammar al-Gaddafi Colonel, De Facto Leader
click to profile Kazakhstan Nursultan Nazarbayev President
click to profile Afghanistan Hamid Karzai President
click to profile Saudi Arabia King Abdullah King
click to profile Turkey Recep Erdoğan Prime Minister
click to profile China Wen Jiabao Premier
click to profile Taiwan Ma Ying-jeou President
click to profile South Korea Lee Myung-bak President
click to profile Burma Than Shwe Senior General
click to profile Indonesia Susilo Bambang President
click to profile Australia Kevin Rudd Minister for Foreign Affairs
click to profile Japan Taro Aso Former Prime Minister
click to profile Turkey Abdullah Gul President
click to profile Serbia Boris Tadić President
click to profile Equatorial Guinea Teodoro Obiang President
click to profile South Africa Nelson Mandela Former President
click to profile Nigeria Umaru Yar’Adua President
click to profile Congo Joseph Kabila President
click to profile Sudan Omar al-Bashir President
click to profile Ukraine Yulia Tymoshenko Prime Minister
click to profile Ukraine Viktor Yanukovych President
click to profile Ukraine Viktor Yushchenko President
click to profile Spain José Zapatero President
click to profile Italy Silvio Berlusconi Prime Minister
click to profile United Kingdom Gordon Brown Prime Minister
click to profile Russia Dmitry Medvedev President
click to profile Cuba Raúl Castro President
click to profile Nicaragua Daniel Ortega President
click to profile Colombia Álvaro Uribe President
click to profile Canada Stephen Harper Prime Minister
click to profile Brazil Lula da Silva President
click to profile Cuba Fidel Castro Former President
click to profile Argentina Cristina Kirchner President
click to profile Ecuador Rafael Correa President
click to profile Chile Michelle Bachelet President
click to profile India Dr. Manmohan Singh Prime Minister
click to profile Russia Vladimir Putin Prime Minister
click to profile Zimbabwe Robert Mugabe President
click to profile France Nicolas Sarkozy President
click to profile Iran Mahmoud Ahmadinejad President
click to profile North Korea Kim Jong-il Ruler
click to profile South Africa Jacob Zuma President
click to profile Venezuela Hugo Chávez President
click to profile China Hu Jintao President
click to profile Mexico Felipe Calderón President
click to profile United States Barack Obama President