Official Stats
- Official Title: President
- Government: Newly established democracy
- Years Left in Office: To 2013: he will never make it that long.
- Political Classification: Center-right
- Education: MA in Political Science
- Age: 66 (born December 24, 1957)
Hamid Karzai Facts and Information
The Rundown
Awesome Afghanistan! The biggest active warfare, chronically-destabilized, NATO-invadin’ Taliban-infested, al-Qaeda-crappin’ hell-hole on earth! And somebody got to be in charge of it, even if it in name only. And that name is Hamid Karzai, President of the place. Labeled as a US-backed stooge and completely corrupt puppet by his enemies, and only as a half-hearted Pashtun punk by his friends, don’t look for a lot of love to be heading your way when you hang with Hamid. So who is this guy and why is he important to know?
Hamd Karzai was born in Khandahar province in southern Afghanistan, and is ethnically a Pashtun—which is important since it is the majority group of the country (located primarily in the south) and serves as the base of power. In other words, it’s the Pashtun majority that voted him into power. But, we are getting ahead of the story already, because Hamid’s rise to the top slot of the Afghan government is not a linear progression…hell, this perplexing Pashtun’s path is as twisted as the Pamir Knot!
See, Karzai was born into a prominent political family in a prominent Pashtun tribe, so he was apparently destined to go up the mediocre ranks of Afghan politics…but then those whacky Soviets decided to invade Afghanistan in 1979, which changed Hamid’s career outlook significantly. Karzai was actually studying abroad when the Soviet takeover happened, so he set himself up in the 1980’s as an advisor and diplomat of the resistance movement of the Mujahideen, or “holy warriors.” Ever see Charlie Wilson’s War? Yeah, those Mujahideen dudes were the ones that the USA covertly funneled hell-tons of money and guns to, and they are the ones who beat the Soviets down until those commies turned tail and left in defeat in 1989.
Why is this back-story important? Because this is when Karzai certainly became known to the US CIA and other government agencies who were conducting the covert war…and relationships were formed that have lasted a miserable lifetime. Karzai became deputy foreign minister in the Afghan postwar government from 1992 to 1994, but the country was soon once again torn apart by civil war as local warlords competed for power. It is at this point that the Taliban movement (who were mostly former Mujahideen, now with nothing to do) took over the country, bringing peace and order—but at the cost of their ultra-insane conservative ideology. Karzai initially supported them, and they even offered him the UN ambassador post, but he broke with the new regime when it fell under the influence of foreign terrorists…namely a bunch of crazy ass Arab extremist, like al-Qaeda. Ah! Starting to see the pieces fall into place here?
Karzai continued to muster up opposition to the Taliban from his exile in Pakistan, and he eventually got it when the US and NATO forces invaded in 2001. Hamid had already been ‘selected’ by his peoples as the leader of a government-in-exile, and given his prior relationship with the CIA, it was a natural leap for the US to then pick him up as a poster-child for democracy and anointed leader of the state once the Taliban were crushed. Having been unofficially ‘given’ the post by the US even before the fall of the Taliban, Hamid officially was elected in (via a US-administered election) in 2004. And now we are up to current events…or the current calamity if you like.
Since taking office, the country has actually plummeted back into horrific warfare, the Taliban has had a massive resurgence, there has been rampant corruption and misallocation of government resources, and Afghanistan has become the largest producer/exporter of heroin. Even as the number of US/NATO troops has increased to over 120,000, the actual real authority and power of the Afghan government has gotten smaller and smaller. Hamid is regularly referred to as “the Mayor of Kabul” in reference to the fact that his true power goes no further than the streets of the capital. If even there.
Apparently, Karzai’s greatest accomplishment thus far is simply not dying: there have already been at least four assassination attempts by various militant group. In fact, the only world leader who is in more danger of assassination than him is perhaps Felipe Calderon! And let’s face it, as much fun as the Mexican Cartels are having with their war on the federal government, the people of Mexico support Calderon and his efforts to clean up their society; not so much with Karzai and his asinine Afghan antics.
Who hates him? Well, let’s see…there is the resurgent Taliban who want his head on a platter. Then there are all the warlords and tribes of northern Afghanistan (who are not Pashtun) and see him as a nepotistic Neanderthal who is only helping out his fellow Pahstuns and screwing the rest of the country. Oh, and there is also many analyst and leaders in the US (and most other Western countries) who think he is wildly corrupt and totally useless. Damn. Sometimes it sucks to be da’ king.
His recent victory in the 2009 presidential election was surrounded with allegations of fraud at the polls. Hamid eventually caved to pressure from the United States and his other allies and declared a run-off election between himself and the runner-up, Abdullah Abdullah. (A dude so nice they named him twice.) However, Abdullah withdrew from the election immediately, declaring that “a transparent election is not possible.”
Further corruption charges have been levied at Karzai and his administration over the years by both his countrymen and the US. Several anti-corruption task forces have been trained and installed by the US in an attempt to curb the rampant issues of graft in the Afghan government. Evidence of those task forces glowing support and intrinsic trust in President Karzai came to light when they arrested one of Karzai’s senior aides in the middle of the night on corruption charges without informing the president….um…yeah..they really trust Hamid a lot. Not.
In reaction to this arrest, Karzai immediately released the aide and imposed new restrictions on the US backed organizations that orchestrated the event. Whether or not this was an attempt to assert the sovereignty of Afghanistan or just Karzai making a poorly disguised move to protect his friends – as he has done with family in the past – remains to be seen. However this is just another episode in the slowly souring relationship between Afghanistan’s current regime and the US. To their credit, both sides are occasionally saying the right things, and in some cases are actually taking actions to improve their working relationship. But don’t be surprised if the U.S. state department breaths a collective sigh of relief if Karzai gets taken out….
Some may look at these incidents and the distribution of power within the government (Karzai’s brother is one of the most powerful politicians/narcotics traffickers in Afghanistan) and worry that Karzai might be plotting to install himself as ruler for life. Being a fan of fancy head-wear myself, I looked even closer and noticed that funny hat he likes to wear. Did you notice it? It’s called a Karakul: a popular hat in the region, but also a favorite of past Afghan kings. What’s more is that when he was appointed the President of the Afghan Transitional Administration back in 2002, he returned home and performed a reenactment of the coronation of the first king of the Durrani Empire in Afghanistan. Hmmmm….freaky.
As crazy as all that sounds, there is little chance of Karzai crowning himself King and spending the rest of his days polishing his royal jewels in a haze of opium. For as long as he has been in power, Karzai has been mocked as the ‘mayor of Kabul,’ and is increasingly disparaged by even his Pashtun backers since the country continues to go into the toilet despite the backing of the great Western Powers. Indeed, Afghanistan is still a complex web of power divided between Karzai government, NATO forces, powerful warlords in the country, and to an increasing degree, the Taliban.
For all his faults and troubles, Karzai has been seen to make some positive steps towards a stable Afghanistan. Most recently he has opened the doors to Japan in an effort to invite industry to come take advantage of some Afghanistan’s untapped natural resources. Karzai has also been improving relations with Pakistan, buddying up with their newly elected President Asif Ali Zardari….however, Zardari himself is yet another suspiciously shady SOB who may not be in power much longer himself, so don’t read too deeply into that love-fest. In the most ballsy move to date, Hamid has also invited the Taliban to legitimately rejoin the government…a move that made the US steam and the Taliban die laughing about.
But if Karzai survives the political arena in Afghanistan, sweet retirement awaits him in the US. Several members of his family have established Afghan-American restaurants in the Washington DC/Maryland area and in Massachusetts…so you may get to meet him someday when he shows you to your table and hands you the wine list. For now, Karzai remains in control of… well, his wardrobe. Time will tell if he has the stones to make himself king, or if assassination attempt number 5 hits the mark. Either way, he is a good leader to know, because his fate is also the fate of a free and democratic Afghanistan. And it ain’t lookin’ good for either right now…
Plaidcasts Involving this Leader
- Bye Bye Bin Laden! Hello Taliban! (part 2) May 18, 2011
- Bye Bye Bin Laden! Hello Taliban! (part 1) May 16, 2011
Video Interviews
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